October is asking me to let go of my plans. It is apparent in the growing disinterest I have had with goals that seemed to be the pinnacle of success just last year. Change is coming.
I cannot say my heart does not skip a beat at the thought, but I have done enough self-discovery thus far to believe in my ability to meld with it. And to its benefit, I can feel that change is eager to work with me, pulling up a chair for me. Change was never my enemy, despite all my best attempts to make it so.
Betterment is change. Recovery is change. Success is change.
I was excluding these parts of change from my life, just as I had broken apart pieces of my whole (body, soul, spirit) and scattered away from myself. I did not believe change, in that nature, could exist for me — at least not without a hefty karmic fee.
Focusing on what I considered the negative side to change like fracture and defeat, seemed more obtainable. Change seemed like it would cling to me rather than I to it. And thus, I avoided change with the urgency that one would use to escape a burning building.
I know better now. That must translate to doing better. Opening up to new passions, targeting action, and controlling my energy flow.
It is less about letting change happen and much more about growing with change.
Which is probably why October also begs me to plan. Begging me daily, actually. Largely because I have been avoiding detailed planning for about two weeks now. Partially because it is daunting and also because I have no clue how to transfer my thoughts onto a page and make sense of them.
All the more reason to sit down with change, alongside self-efficacy and consistency, and determine our positions for this next season of life.
Ooo that part about change clinging to you rather than you clinging to it …😮💨 I felt that in my soul! I feel like I run away or avoid change as much as possible because of the discomfort that comes with being in the middle of it.